Watch this entertaining video (courtesy The Consumerist) about a man that was smart enough to videotape being stuck on the runway for almost 7 hours in a plane:
I now present 1-act play that I call...
Delta Crisis Response Squad
[Scene: Delta CEO's office]
DELTA CEO: "I feel like going for a plane ride today." [Picks up phone.] "Yes, I'd like 2 tickets... one for me and one for that suspicious-looking guy that works in IT... yeah, yeah, the one with the beard and the crazy eyes. ... tell him it's a business lunch."
[Scene: Airplane interior. Delta CEO and Suspicious IT Employee are sitting next to one another in coach]
CEO: "Thanks for joining me on this not-at-all-strange midair business lunch."
SITE: "Oh, no problem. It's nice to get out sometimes. And with the CEO, no less!"
CEO: "Of course. Would you mind taking a picture of me?"
SITE: "Sure thing, boss!"
[CEO hands camera to employee]
CEO: "HELP! This suspicious-looking man with a beard and crazy eyes is trying to learn the secrets of air travel! Homeland Security! Batman! George W. Bush! Any properly diligent citizen! Stop him!"
[A puff of smoke appears. Dick Cheney emerges from the blackness]
CHENEY: "We have underestimated terror. Clearly it wishes to expose the foibles of modern air travel through the black magic of 'film' and 'moving pictures.' I banish thee to Gitmo, Guillermo del Terror!"
[Lightning flies from his fingers and strikes Employee, who disappears.]
CHENEY: "Furthermore I ban all cameras, camcorders, and camera phones from planes! Or else terror will win!"
CHENEY: "May I have some of those peanuts?"
CEO: "No, they weren't budgeted for this flight."