I'd like to think this will bring the lolcats phenomenon to its logical conclusion

The LOLCats must be stopped.

Have no idea what I'm talking about? Slate has an informative slide-show about the phenomenon.

I didn't really laugh at them at all until one of my favorite Pajiba writers submitted a list of phrases that don't hold up to lolcat pidgin.

With that inspiration and the power of the creative commons license (Thank you, Flickr), I present to you my one and only entry into image macros, proof that not all things can be made cuter with poor grammar and kitties:



Phrase courtesy of Dan Carlson and original image courtesy of Homingpigen, via Creative Commons license, on Flickr.

o hai i iz photoshop mastah.

You finally made a monkey out of me

What a twist!



If you simultaneously need to a) spoil movies for people; and b) wear a shirt, then Threadless has just the shirt for you:



In case you're wondering, it spoils: Star Wars; Planet of the Apes; The Usual Suspects; The Wicker Man; The Crying Game; The Sixth Sense; Harry Potter 6; Dallas "Who Shot J.R.?"; The Matrix; Fight Club; 300; Citizen Kane; The Others; Psycho; Soylent Green; The Village; A Beautiful Mind; Donnie Darko.

So if you haven't seen/read any of those, you probably shouldn't have read any of this.

... crap.

Spoilt by Oliver Moss [Threadless]

Post Office, 1; Amateur personal financiers, 0

As I'm sure you've heard by now, the Post Office has come out with a non-value first class stamp called the "Forever" stamp. 41 cents per stamp now will send a first-class letter for life with that baby.

Better stock up, right?

Wrong. Read this tersely worded write-up from Slate:

Should we all be stocking up?

Absolutely not. Since 1971, postal rates have increased more slowly than the actual inflation rate, as measured by the U.S. Consumer Price Index. So, despite the numerous rate hikes over the last 36 years, stamps have actually been getting cheaper. ... Should this historical pattern hold, you'd be paying more for today's forever stamps than you would for any stamp in the future, no matter how high the rate goes.

In fact, this pattern must hold—as a matter of law. In December, President Bush signed the Postal Accountability and Enhancement Act, which ensures that future price increases will be kept below an inflation-based ceiling. In other words, postage hikes will never surpass inflation—and the forever stamp will never become a good investment.

Cue the Debbie Downer waaah-waaaah sound effect.

Related: can we please call a moratorium on complaining about the cost of postage? Last time I checked, the ability to send a letter anywhere in the country and have it get there in a few days (even Saturday!) for only 41 cents is a miracle. You can't even get a soda for that price anymore.

Side note: anyone catch The Office finale? 1) I've never been happier with the writers' decision to make Ryan a douchebag. 2) Dear NBC: Give Creed a blog. For real. 3) I guess something big happened between Jim and Pam as well.

Look at my category! It's... big

So, I was scanning the article on Wikipedia about Alia Shawkat because, like George Michael, I have an inappropriate crush on Maeby Fünke, and I noticed this in the list of article categories at the bottom:



... ... really? Must be a big collection. Like, 6 billion articles. Well, according to the collection's front page, it's got 127,000. Sounds like a new way to waste time at work.

This could backfire

Newest online "security" feature that is bound to fail: those "Verify Your Age" forms that where you put in your birthday to A) verify that you're 18, or however old you have to be (some beer sites check if you're 21); B) test if you're capable of second-grade math.

I don't know if anyone else had this experience, but turning 18 merely meant that I didn't feel as guilty when I told the porn sites that, yes indeed, I was old enough to be looking. Just sayin'...

Dear internets: give people some credit. Especially now that these time-wasting surveys are slapped on everything from beer sites to YouTube videos with naughty language.

I also considered that these things could just be ploys to get demographic data for advertisers--have to get that 18–34 male demo! If that's the case, I just like to screw with them:



I figure if they use this to target advertisements, saying I'm 98 will merely increase the number of targeted ads I receive for Fiber One and pralines while keeping the amount of adds for penile enlargement creams roughly the same.

People have too much spare time

While I'm stuck in the lab, thank god for folks that have enough time to create movies about Mario getting strung out on mushrooms and stars and mistreating the princess. Must watch:



This is pretty much hilarious 90% of the time, which makes it 9 million percent better than the average video on YouTube.

[Mario: Game Over] courtesy of DeadSpin and Kotaku.

Conan is funny when he goes places

Were you aware? Whenever Conan O'Brien goes somewhere, funny stuff happens.

Like this recent trip to Industrial Light and Magic:



You'll note that Conan's 30 seconds as a CGI-rendered alien is more entertaining than 3 movies worth of Jar Jar Binks all 3 prequels.

If making fun of nerds isn't your thing, try this one, where he invades a group of 1864-rules baseball recreationists:



His interactions with the widow are priceless.

And, yes, I don't really know how the baseball one is that far removed from making fun of nerds.

The most important thing I have learned this semester

I knew it!!



This tidbit brought to you via The A.V. Club.